starkweek:

jesus, take the wheel. now put it in first - no, put the clutch in and - jesus, what the fuck, you said you could drive stick

davestrider123:

the-rogue-0f-light:

conquerorwurm:

seifukucat:

can a ghost and a zombie come from the same person

Is this a comic? This should be a comic.

"no stupid, oh my god. no just… just turn… fuck. don’t wander over there, you’re gonna fall down the… aaand there he goes………….. moron.”

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amazing

drunktrophywife:

Who could honestly say this to their mom without getting knocked into the next dimension

andrewquo:

my friend wouldn’t stop asking about how my video was going, so i sent him a screenshot

ectolime:

clay-phoenix:

leo-arcana:

lil-weezing:

ask-flameprince:

ask-alex-the-vampire-princess:

arthur-christmas-claus:

auspisstice:

ferlmao:

himapapaftw:

blackmormon:

i think Paulina from danny phantom is the older Trixie tang

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I wouldn’t be surprised

Woah woah woah, that means

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whA T

HEADCANON ACCEPTED

Can we please not forget about this? 

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Wait then what if

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i cannot accept this

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WHAT THE FRICK IS GOING ON

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friends forever

I’m pretty sure Paulina was Latina but okay

“Are you the SAT because I’d do you for 3 hours and 45 minutes with a 10 minute break halfway through for snacks, and then I can stare at you for like 10 minutes and think ‘wow, I hope I don’t ruin this.’”

Dude on OKC with the best pick up lines I have ever heard (via dutchster)

drkarayua:

piertotum-locomottor:

deepthoughtmod:

This guy was the leader of the improv comedy group I was in

who the fuck carries fake blood everywhere

leaders of improv comedy groups obviosuly

stabs:

My dad just saw my report card and started yelling at me because there was an F on it, but it actually was F for female as in gender

“Don’t marry a man unless you would be proud to have a son exactly like him.”

Unknown (via obsessiveobsessions)r (via livelifetipsy)

trillgamesh:

it’s like you’re my mirror